.....feel lost right now. When I feel I had control, I lost it. Control of my feelings is what I am saying. Why am I not in control of my feelings? How can I give one person so much power over me in such a short amount of time? I feel co-dependent on another person to survive. That is horrible. I want control back so bad. I don't know how to get it back.
This is all because of a girl, yet again. Why do I let myself get in these situations. I even had sex with her and it just seems all wrong. At the time of course it seems like the best idea in the world, but now, well, I honestly don't regret it. I think at that time I did have very strong feelings. Her decision to pull back has made my feelings for her change. I can't keep blaming myself for everything. I think I need to back away from this before it escalates any further. I think I will tell her tomorrow and begin yet another journey to find that woman who I want to spend my time with.
I did call that number for therapy. They did call me back and my insurance might not cover it. I am going to find out in about a week or so. Maybe this is the step I need to help me. I have most of my other affairs in order for my life. I want to be happy, I really do.
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Ask them about their sliding scale. My insurance didn't cover them either but we worked it out so that I give them a set amount each time I go in.
ReplyDeleteAlready did. They called me and I am going to schedule an appointment when they call me back :). Thank you.
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